


One Minute Back

by maeumdaero_hae



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Harry Lives, Hurt Eggsy Unwin, Hurt Harry Hart, M/M, Post V-Day, Regret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:28:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24131350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maeumdaero_hae/pseuds/maeumdaero_hae
Summary: "Why not?!" Eggsy shouted at Merlin. Why is Merlin so against doing anything to make Harry remember?"Because I don't want him to suffer Eggsy. I don't want to subject my best friend to hurt and pain in seeing you and Princess Tilde together."
Relationships: Merlin & Gary "Eggsy" Unwin, Tilde (Kingsman) & Gary "Eggsy" Unwin
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	One Minute Back

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first work in the kingsman fandom and its angst and i dont know what to feel about that. 
> 
> additional tags bc i cant tag properly on my phone : harry lives but still doesnt remember, i havent rewatched tgc in years so i abstained from mentioning any names from it. 
> 
> this is born because i have yet to see a fic where hartwin relationship deals with eggsy/tilde (so please if you know any fic with that content please let me know!)
> 
> comments and kudos are always appreciated! thank you!

"Why not?!" Eggsy shouted at Merlin. He doesn't understand. Why is Merlin so against doing anything to make Harry remember? 

Merlin looked at him as if waiting for Eggsy to join in the dance. Eggsy looked straight ahead to Merlin's eyes to show that not is he only confused but also angry at Merlin. 

Merlin never removed his stare on him as he spoke slowly and clearly. "Because I don't want him to suffer Eggsy. I don't want to subject my best friend to hurt and pain in seeing you and Princess Tilde together."

Merlin saw the moment Eggsy's anger was washed away and turn into confusion. "What? What do you mean?"

"I said what I said, Eggsy." Merlin turned around and held the knob of the door. "I'm gonna ask how we can get Harry back with us and only that."

Eggsy was left on the room confused and regret coming all together crashing on him. 

Reading between the lines, Merlin had implied that Harry has feelings, affection - what do Harry even call that, infatuation? - for him. Eggsy couldn't help his legs as it weakens. No, that's not true. Eggsy had a carried feelings for Harry the moment he saved Eggsy from Dean and it grew more along the training period. He'd looked for signs and clues or just something to prove Roxy's theory that Harry also had feelings for him but he never saw one. He longed so hard for Harry to reciprocate it but Eggsy was also happy and content with all the moments they had together. 

Eggsy was ready to confess to Harry as he made promise to himself to do anything to be Lancelot. He told this to Roxy and even she cheered him up. It was until they had asked for him to shoot JB and he just can't. 

He failed and then he came home and his mum has another black eye and he just wants to punch Dean. Just once, just to make a statement to show that he's changed and to never hit his mum again. 

But Harry intervened and Eggsy has this dignified stance as he argued with Harry. The disappointed glance Harry showed him registered and that was the moment he swallowed his feelings and vowed to never say anything about it. 

(It was only after V-day when Eggsy was mulling at their new house, of course without Dean as his mum filed divorce, Daisy fast asleep on his chest that Eggsy realized that its not really disappointed that was shown in Harry's face. It was more of a sadness and regret.)

It took time but he moved on, he tried so hard with Princess Tilde. Tilde being the best Princess understood what Eggsy had been dealing with and told him to take whatever they are slowly. 

And now in just one day he found out that Harry's alive, that Harry doesn't remember anything about his life except that he loves butterflies, that Harry had feelings for him. 

A knock snapped him out. It was Merlin with a folder of files placed in front of him on the table. The man sat in front of him and slid the folder towards Eggsy. 

"I called in a favor to let us get Harry out of here." Merlin said, his tone professional and none of the emotions he showed a while ago. "We just need to wait three days for them to let Harry get to know us and another three days before we fly out."

Eggsy opened the folder as Merlin pushed it more to him. The folder consists of papers about Harry, birth certificate, highschool and college diplomas, as well as a few papers about him talking at a summit, probably about butterflies, Eggsy thought. He knew some of these were fake since it coincide the years with Harry as an active Kingsman agent. Eggsy looked up to Merlin for explanation. 

"That would be his new background. As you know realize some of those are fake and while I want to erase his life as a Kingsman, I won't entirely. He's still going to be a patron of the Kingsman tailors but without knowing he was an agent."

"Can we just do this? Not give him a choice whether or not he wants to remember?" Eggsy knew he has no right to ask this but he had to. 

"As cruel as it sounds, no. I don't want to see him so detached to himself again Eggsy, not when you have Tilde with you now. He might hate me when he knows about this but I wont regret this." While Eggsy noted Merlin's use of when and not if, he didn't comment on it. It is possible that Harry remembers naturally. 

The two agents were back at looking at each other in the eyes. A few moments of silence hovered among them.

"I really liked him too, y'know. I was ready to confess to 'im an' all after I become Lancelot. But I couldn't just shoot JB, guv, I just couldn't." Eggsy said in small voice. He doesn't know why he even said this, if he's convincing Merlin to let Harry remember again or if he just want to let Merlin know he didn't intend to let Harry go through that. 

"I know you won't pull the trigger, Eggsy, Harry did too but he never said it. He did tell me how he was still proud of you and that was one of the thing he admired about you."

"I thought I disappointed him. I saw mr. pickles in his bathroom and I said many things. If you was Harry, I think you'd be so pissed at me." Eggsy lowly chuckled. "Then I said to meself I won't ever tell him my feelings, yeah? Cuz y'know, I disappointed him an' all that. Then the bloke had to die in front of me and I dunno, guv, I was just regretting I didn't tell'im." Eggsy lowered his head and blinked the incoming tears away. 

"That's the thing about Harry, he always do anything for him not to regret it later. That's also how I just knew for sure I won't let him remember you. I will let him remember Kingsman and maybe in time, his days as Galahad but never about you. It would eat him inside out, Eggsy, how he didn't confessed to you earlier. I won't watch him ruin himself thinking about the what-ifs Eggsy. I saw him once doing that, it was enough." Merlin's tone was as emotional as a long time best friend talking about his long time best friend. And maybe that's what Eggsy has somewhat forgotten, that Merlin knew Harry more. It really sounds cruel as Merlin specified how he won't let Harry remember Eggsy but Eggsy somehow understands. 

The regret Eggsy felt was more prominent right now at this moment that he felt the tears roll down and he didn't do anything to stop or hide it. It's just a matter of right thing in a wrong time but that's it, right? He never felt so right knowing that Harry had also liked him but it's impossible for him to just leave Tilde. It hurts Eggsy more to think that Tilde would send him happily to Harry because that's how down to earth she is. Roxy might even punch him one or two if he does that. And god, Harry might never even talk to him again if he knew Eggsy left Tilde just for him. It would not be because of that reason exactly but because of how Harry hadn't had any control of the situation. 

And now, Merlin's telling him how letting Harry know Eggsy liked him so much would be more dangerous. Eggsy couldn't help it. It's as if fate is playing with him right now. He can't help but feel so sad, he can't even have the right to feel betrayed and angry. 


End file.
